mad in pursuit journal

DISPATCHED FROM THE CROSSROADS, AT THE intersection OF redemption & disillusionment

Working On A Story

I'm trying to finish my radio script. I want to tell the story of my keeping a public journal on the internet, a combination of my old bio and an essay I wrote for a writing class in 2001. It's the story of my redemption from 50-year-old corporate dogsbody to the... uh, whatever it is I am today.

It would be too simple to just tell an amusing anecdote: I thought I was keeping a secret web diary till my mother found me, ha-ha.

It's been years since I wrote those entries and so much has changed. I think my original persona "Maddie" did really help extricate me from the angry Institution that my career had become. But I start going through the old notebooks and web entries and I get lost in my own timeline.

What really did happen? What new insight can I gain? Unfortunately these questions tend to pull me away from the Redemption story (reinvention of myself on the web) and into the Disillusionment and Betrayal story (deteriorating life at the Institution). That story needs to be finished too, but I'm trying to be disciplined about one thing at a time this week.

I'm back on track, I think. The story structure is finally in place (I think)... all I need now are good sentences.



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GOAL... 1. Finish my radio script. This is creating a mental logjam. Be ready to record on Saturday. (from 4.23.06)